The Two – The Assistant
This is the second article of a nine-part series in getting to know the types. I go into type Two—the Giver who’s motivated by giving of themselves. This can be in many ways, socially, sexually, work and family. Twos core value is to be loved and to give love in return.
Type 2
The Two, the Assistant—are known for turning on the seductive charms and seeking attraction in basic ways, in fact, the Assistant can have love or rage, and fits of jealous and become possessive—by trying to stop their basic fear of being unloved. The Assistant—the Two is also part of the heart triad of the Enneagram (Two, Three, Four)
Basic Anxiety:
The main thought of the Two being unloved for who they are—so they compensate by doing for others in order to seek love.
Basic Want:
The main goals for Twos are to be loved by others.
The role of the Assistant is giving of themselves—this could be by volunteering, feeding the needy or homeless or caring for the sick. If you were to categorize—Jesus, he would fall under this Enneagram Type Two and also Mother Teresa. Though, I most likely would see Jesus in all types because Twos do things to feel a sense of connection and to get something back. So in the case of what Jesus wanted from others—it would have been disciples to follow him. Though, when Jesus had that one weak moment, and asked God, “Why have you forsaken me?” I think we can say—he was feeling a bit left out for all the sacrifices he was giving to mankind.
Think of the great mother role model who does everything for her children, giving to them tirelessly for the good of the family. Twos feel the needs of the many out ways the needs of the one.
One of the main issues with a Two type is co-dependency and always doing too much for others. This can lead to feeling bitter and rejected, because Twos subsequently, feel that they are doing so much for their loved ones, they feel they are often left out.
How to Help the Two:
The main issue with the Assistant is that they become stuck with shifting feelings of love and rage. If they do too little their core value of helping others isn’t met. If they do too much, they feel their needs aren’t being met and act out in some way to retain that love they seek.
Assistants can help themselves by understanding their true self, and become authentic in giving and nurturing others—that true selfless acts, will always reap rewards from others. Love ones will truly love the Assistant inside the true you, not someone you pretend to be, to seek out love.
Ones in Culture
Madonna, Dolly Parton, Mother Teresa, Nancy Reagan, Jesus, Arianna Huffington
